If you don’t ask, you don’t get!

If you don’t ask, you don’t get. That is the reflection of the day. Asking questions sometimes for the questions of what we want, it is sometimes so difficult for so many of us to be able to just ask. We actually create stories that lead us into this life where we are full of limitations and we create those stories that are going to give us the answer to the questions that we’re asking and usually the answers are not what we want. So, we need to start working in a different direction. We need to start creating the courage to just ask for what we want. It is as simple as that. Start with the little questions that will start building your resistance and resilience of asking for bigger things. For example, one of the things that I find, many times, being in this business is that employees don’t ask for a raise. They’re afraid to ask for a raise. Many of them actually end up leaving because they were afraid to ask for the raise and they decided to go someplace else and ask for more money, someplace else, even if they’re happy. Many times, we don’t ask because we feel we don’t deserve and this is something that professionally, I have seen and I have experienced myself.
I remember in Scarsdale Medical, where I was the Executive Director. For so many years, they were giving me this raise and it was a few percentage a year and I felt that it wasn’t right. For a long time, I was working. I was cheap labor because I did not value myself. So, I would just accept whatever they were going to give me. But ironically, one day, I ended up going to a seminar. It is called the Landmark Seminar and there was homework that I needed to do and I needed to get uncomfortable. The homework was for me to decide what I was going to get uncomfortable with. So, I decided to go and when the doctors came to tell me about my raise, I asked for them to investigate if that was a fair raise for me to get. And I said, “You need to speak with the accountant. You need to speak with the lawyer and see if I deserve that.” That question and that ask led me to a thirty thousand dollar raise and I think back and I realize that that is when I started to get the courage to be asking for what I deserve. But so many of us think we don’t deserve much. So, we stop asking and we just settle. That happens in relationships as well. I experienced that myself. I talk about this in my book on the relationships that I had. I didn’t ask for many things. I just settled because I didn’t think I deserved it. So today, I want to encourage you to start getting the courage to just ask and don’t start practicing what the answer is going to be. Just let the answer be. Just let it be. You’ll be surprised of how many yes’ and how much more you can get out of life when you just go and ask the questions of what you want.

So today, I am asking you to reflect on this. How many things do you want and you are afraid to ask because you don’t think you deserve it. Today, I ask you to reflect, reset and reconnect.

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