When we hear the word debts, we certainly relate it to money and financial management; but what would you think if someone tells you that there are also emotional debts and that there may be a relationship between these and financial debts?
Emotional debts refer to that feeling of having a pending account, either with yourself or with others, because you committed to doing something and could not fulfill it. And whether you are aware of this debt or not, messages will seep inside you that will make you feel guilty.
Just as in the case of financial debts, emotional debts often cause distress and become a burden that prevents us from moving toward the life we long for. Today, I invite you to learn a little more about this type of debt.
Types of emotional debts
There are different types of emotional debts and they are divided into two main types: Emotional debts due to social patterns, which are based on popular beliefs, and personal emotional debts, which have their origin in personal feelings that have not been properly healed or traumatic experiences.
Emotional debts due to social patterns
Favors among friends. This is a false belief and occurs when a person receives a favor or help from a friend, and therefore feels indebted to that friendship.
Kindness to coworkers. It also happens in work relationships when one person helps another in one of his or her tasks.
Emotional blackmail. It happens when a person asks another person to behave in a certain way, or perform a certain action and in return offers some kind of reward. It is very common between parents and children and in couples.
Personal emotional debts
Mistakes made. When a person makes a mistake with another person, he/she feels the need to apologize or redeem him/herself. If this does not happen, an emotional debt arises.
Personal disappointment. When a person feels disappointed in themselves or has the feeling of not having made the right decisions, these feelings become emotional debts.
Traumatic experiences. Among the many sequels that can bring us the fact of facing a traumatic situation, is the feeling of needing to detach from that trauma. As long as this cannot be achieved, the person will feel indebted to him/herself.
In addition to making you feel frustration and guilt, emotional debts can also lead you to reproach yourself and treat yourself harshly. It is important that you identify these debts and, as in the case of financial debts, find a way to pay them off.
How to pay off an emotional debt?
Paying attention to your relationships and looking for a way to close the situations that have generated emotional debts is fundamental to having a full life. Take note of the following actions that can help you in this process:
– Do not accept situations that leave you hooked to the feeling of debt.
– Don’t feel bad about prioritizing yourself.
– Seek closure on situations that make you feel indebted.
– Once you pay off your debts, avoid generating new ones.
– Learn to let go of whatever is keeping you from being at peace.
If you feel you need help to leave behind those emotional debts that do not allow you to move forward, do not hesitate to seek a mental health professional who can support you in this process.
Is there any relationship between emotional debt and financial debt?
Although it may seem that there is not much relation between one and the other, financial debts have their origin in the emotions of guilt that we keep inside us. Developing emotional debts, besides affecting our mental health and our relationships, can also affect the financial sphere and become an obstacle to have the life we long for and deserve.
Today, I want to invite you to heal everything that prevents you from moving forward. Find in my podcast valuable tools to leave behind those emotional debts that are blocking you and to work consistently in all the pillars of life: fitness, finances, faith, family and fun.