A necessary list for people that are searching for love. That is the reflection of the day. As some of you have heard, I started making the decision about a month and half ago that I was going to be searching for love. That I was going to be finding the time which I have been neglecting to find because I’ve been too busy. But as I embarked on this journey, I got an idea from my son, Franco, to create a negotiable list and a non-negotiable list. The non-negotiable list is all of those characteristics that you will not be able to negotiate and the rest are negotiable. When you say negotiable, it means that there are things that you’re going to have to adjust to or the other person would have to change but they are not critical if the person doesn’t change. However, for example, I have about 10 things that are non-negotiable on the list. Love and kindness is on the top. So if I find someone that is sarcastic that likes to make fun of other people, that is something that I see immediately, then that’s non-negotiable. This is not someone I’m going to date. If I find somebody that doesn’t like the fact that I have a 12 year old daughter. At our age of 56 let’s face it, most people have been done raising their kids but I happen to have a 12 year old daughter. If I meet somebody that is going to be okay interacting and welcoming her and if that person has a hard time with that and understanding that there’s going to be limitations of traveling and things like that, then that is non-negotiable. I won’t see this person. I need somebody that is financially free because I am financially free. So, if I want to do the activities like, for example, skiing, then if that person is not able to do it, then that is going to get in the way. That is why it’s so Important to have a clear list of what you’re looking for and what you’re willing to negotiate and what you’re not. When you do this, there is so much power on that list. It seems like something that is simple but, you know, it took me a little bit of time to make sure that I had everything that I knew I would not be able to negotiate so that I will stop dating with that person if I saw it. It is extremely empowering to have such clarity on what you want and I’m excited because I know that my decision with this individual that is coming to me or is in my life, is already a decision that is going to be very clear. The direction will be easier. It will be a straight road instead of a curvy road. I am encouraging you to realize if you are starting the search for love or if you are with someone because you could go through that exercise even if you are with someone. If you really understand the core values that you want the person to represent, then whether you are with this person now or you just started dating, then you can make a decision on what to do because you have clarity. So today, I am going to challenge you to create the negotiable and non-negotiable list. The non-negotiable list is extremely important. The negotiable list is going to be less that will be coming on as you develop a relationship or you might be already in a relationship and you’re always going to have to make adjustments because there is not a perfect being. It starts with you. You are not perfect. I’m not perfect. This person will have to adjust to my imperfections as well. So let’s reflect, reset and reconnect.
- September 2, 2020