Conversation without a clear intention leads to disconnection. That is the reflection of the day. So the concept of intention is one that I think we miss so many times because of our ego, because of the desire to be right or the desire to show somebody that you are stronger than they are. This is something that happens a lot in relationships with our spouses, I believe, and sometimes, even with our children. Where the intention that we have when married was the intention of unity and longevity with this person. Somehow, throughout the years, that shifts and we lose the clarity of the intention and we start having conversations where the intentions were shifted. Instead of love and kindness, it becomes a righteous intention. An intention of, I’m going to prove to you that I am right no matter what. One of the side effects of this, reminded me of a quote from Dr. Stephen Covey’s book, “The 7 Habits of Effective People” where he says, “Seek first to understand, then be understood.” That is a very powerful quote because I think what happened, throughout getting comfortable in relationships, is that we completely forget to try to understand. We have a hard time just stopping completely. Stopping and listening when the other person is speaking but listening with intention of connection, not destruction. That is a concept that I think so many people can adopt and the world would be a better place. But our ego, many times, just doesn’t allow us to just be wrong. It is okay to be wrong. Even sometimes when you are right, I rather be wrong if it’s going to create a disconnection with the people that I love. Let them be right. Choose what you really need to fight about. But it gets to the point where we’re going through our daily lives and we are just fighting about everything. Every little thing that doesn’t have much of a meaning in life. In the midst of that relationship, we get lost. We get lost because we are not seeking first to understand. We are seeking first to be understood and if they don’t get it, then we get frustrated. We get frustrated, then the other person goes and gets frustrated. We create a vicious cycle of unhappiness, loneliness and darkness and we lose the intention along the way. I remember, this week, speaking with someone and I was listening to the conversation very carefully trying to guide this person. I asked a question, “So what is the intention? Is the intention to prove your ex-wife to be wrong or is it for you to be able to get peace and quietness for your children? Which one is it? Is it for you to be able to find a way to connect with your children more and more for your children to suffer less and less? So this concept which is a concept that we tend to forget is one of the reasons why I love doing these reflections. Because it brings me back to centeredness and that is why I love sharing with you. Because if you’re listening to this, I really hope that you are someone that is trying already to bring positive change in their lives. Because, otherwise, you wouldn’t take the time to listen to a podcast. You wouldn’t take the time to listen to my reflection. So today, deeply, I want you to reflect and reset and reconnect!
